Table Manners in a Lecture Hall

I didn't wake up in a bad mood or anything this morning, but I was agitated once I got to campus.  Generally, the lecture hall is pretty chilly so I wear a jacket or a hoodie.  This morning the weatherman said it would be in the 70s today, and when I was leaving the house at 6:30am, it was already in the 60s.  Figuring that I would be stuck in a cool lecture hall, I sleepily threw on a nasty looking t-shirt and a hoodie and went to school.

As luck would have it, it was unbearably hot, and I couldn't take off the hoodie since I threw on some nasty looking t-shirt and a sports bra. This agitated me.

So, I've got a seat saved for my friend who is always late to class, but on the other side of her chair is a girl who spent around 5 minutes fumbling to get her breakfast out of her bag.  Now, far be it for me to criticize anyone for eating in class, because I do it all the time.  However, if you're going to eat in class, there's some basic etiquette.

1) don't bring obnoxious smelling food (ex: fish, Indian food, Mexican food) that will either disgust everyone or make them all very hungry.
2) don't bring it in some wrapper that makes more noise than 10,000 girls at a Justin Bieber concert.
3) don't make a mess all over everything
4) DON'T LET HALF THE LECTURE HALL HEAR YOU CHOMPING!

This girl brought a ziplock bag of Life cereal (one of my favorites with raisins! mmm) and proceeded to eat.  She was placing one square at a time in her mouth and chomping and crunching it so loudly that everyone around her was giving her the side eye.  This ziplock bag was FULL of cereal and after the first three chomps, I glanced at the bag to see how long this hell would last and I was just outright angry.

Luckily, so I thought, the professor started talking louder (probably because he, too, could hear her chomping), and I assumed that this would mask the sound of sweetened whole grain being mangled in her mouth, but no such luck.  She actually, and I swear on this, was chomping LOUDER the as the professor spoke louder.  It was obnoxious.  Her appetite must have overcome her, because after about 5 minutes of the insane chewing she started eating 4 or 5 squares at a time.  I must have glared at her at least 10 times, and perhaps she saw me and decided to eat faster so I didn't reach over and choke her ass to death.

This cow chomped and chomped and chomped and then chugged some water noisily, then went back to chomping.  I was about to freak out when she finally finished the bag of cereal.  She proceeded to make noise and meticulously close the ziplock bag while pressing all the air out of it against her desk.  She then folded it up nicely and placed it in her bag with these awkward, dainty hand gestures.  HELLO! You just ate like a damn Holstein cow!  There's nothing delicate, dainty, and feminine about this!

Great morning that was.  Luckily, the saving grace was that my quiz in that class was really easy, and I was very prepared for it.